Dear Chel,
Hi! :) If you are reading this, that means you remembered that you wrote this seven years ago. For me who is here in the year 2012, this is a letter which is still in-construction as I really have no idea what to write here. I just have this urge to write a time capsule (albeit a virtual one). I will just write what I'm currently thinking of, and I dearly hope that somehow, all that I will say to you will make sense.
First, how did college go? Did you aim higher for yourself or for others? Did you continue your minor in creative writing? Were you able to graduate with latin honors? Were you able to sustain your friendship with your three closest friends? Why did you do those things? Tell me, I want to hear your stories. I want to know whether you finally gathered the courage to tell NC that you liked him, or you met an extraordinary person who changed your life. I am ecstatic to hear your tales about your pranks and whatnot. Were you able to at least achieve something from our plans? Tell me. My ears are ready.
Second, I want you to know that even if you failed at a lot of things, you still have your loved ones, especially your family. You are in that state for a reason. You are there because something magical is about to happen (or maybe it already happened? :) ). If you are still asking what is your purpose in life, go to Him. He knows what is best for us. Time and time again, He has proven to be the one source of our solace and comfort. His will be done, right? So, go to Him, and ask Him if we are on the right path.
Third, congratulations! You deserve a big, big hug from your 18-year old self. :) You are still alive and kicking. You are able to survive life! :) >:D< But, it's time to take our maturity a notch higher. It's not right to keep grudges, okay? So, LET GO. Allow yourself to be happy. Hihi.
Fourth, how are your relationships? How are Mama and Papa? Are you still living with them? If yes, are you giving them your monthly contribution for the house? If no, why did you move out? Is Papa still working? Are you able to buy things for them from your own money? How is Ate? Is she still in the medical school? What specialization is she planning to take? Are you still as close as now? Did she truly end up with D? How are our relatives? Are both families still closely-knit as ever? I do hope so.
Lastly, how's your heart? Are you in a relationship right now? If yes, are you happy? If no, why not? Remember our mantra about this? You don't deserve anything less. :) I hope that you were able to experience loving after the disastrous attempts we had back when we were still in high school. Don't be so cynical and close-minded. Take everything as it is. Open your heart again to the possibilities. Stop being in denial.
It's already 2:45 am. I have to stop writing this. I hope you notice that this letter is not really about the past seven years. This is about evaluating whether our life made significant changes to others or if the passiveness of some of the things that surrounded us affected the way we lived. This is about reflecting on what we have become. Did we change for the better or for the worse?
I'm ending this abruptly, as all thoughts end in our heads-- forever switching.
Take care, okay?
Please still be sane,
-- Chel (18).
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